8 months old! We started the new daycare September 1st. They are a little weird, but I absolutely love the care they are getting there, it's actually a lot better than the other place. It's very educational - they read books to them, they have a theme of the season (when we went to check out the place it was watermelon and now that it's fall, it is apples, where they do "activities" and read books about apples. They go outside twice a day, and I think they went outside about 3 times total in the 6 weeks at the other place.
Still this place is a lot more expensive, and just a hassle to get to, so I think we'll still switch to the other toddler daycare we loved when they are 18 months old - we'll save $100 a WEEK!
I am thinking their motor skills are a little delayed, as they're still not sitting up by themselves. I can sit them up and they'll stay up for a little while, but inevitably will do something that shakes their balance and they end up down again.
Still, N is rocking back and forth and starting to make a tiny bit of progress in crawling. M has just started doing the rocking back and forth (whereas N has been doing it for about a month) so she's behind N in that.
They are finally able (with a pillow) to sit in a restaurant high chair. They are so tiny that it's huge on them, hence why the pillow is needed but it's very cute :) We go on vacation for a week with friends next month so I'm excited to see how they do!
One year ago this weekend was our gender reveal party!
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Friday, August 16, 2013
Back in the swing of things, mostly!
It's been one month since the girls started daycare and two weeks since I went back to work! This poor blog is getting so neglected. It's so hard to find the time to write but I really want to...just not sure what to say most of the time.
The four day work week is helping, as Fridays are my day I get to catch up with the house ( a mis-nomer - I get a little bit done, but never enough!). It's nice to relax a bit though after a whole week of go go go.
Daycare has been pretty good so far. I was so nervous about it because I chose them so quickly (since I had no other choice) and they (the daycare teachers) are all REALLY young over there. But they seem to love the girls and they send me pics of the girls throughout the day quite often, in addition to me seeing every time they change, feed or nap. I'm addicted to that app.
But unfortunately, L's office is moving about 30 minutes away in November, and it will be really out of the way for us, so, in order not to be caught without a daycare like we were initially, we started looking a couple of weeks ago. First I called the daycare I wanted from the beginning because it has such a good reputation, but they once again were so snotty to me. I don't understand. I PAID an application fee over a year ago now and they told me I would able to start around the time I wanted. Not only do they still not have any spots, when I asked them when they thought they might be able to take the girls they were like, "Um...November, maybe December. Maybe not. And even then, there might be only 1 spot available." WTF did I pay $ for? I'm so angry about it.
So I googled around looking for other day cares and found a toddler daycare (starts at 18 months) nearby where L's office will be moving to. And while the girls couldn't start there till next August, I wanted to check it out to get on the list now and make sure I was definitely able to start when I wanted to. Even if we had to stay with the daycare that's out of the way for awhile, at some point we'd be able to switch over.
It was great. We loved it so much, and we talked to the director and were assured (without putting any money down) that they will call US and we are definitely in next year.
I called a few other places close to his work and got info, but didn't find glowing reviews about anyplace else except for this one in the federal building. I called and they said their waiting list was until about March 2014. Ugh. But I decided to fill out an application anyway since it was free (ahem, NO application fee!) and I wrote a note with it saying I had twins and was desperate to find a spot in the next few months since my husband's job was moving.
Long shot, but the very next day after I mailed it they called me and said they had two spots opening in September. Whoa! Now really, September is a little bit earlier than we need, but beggars can't be choosers. L and I went and visited it and liked it very much. I think the commute is going to be a bit rough for me for awhile as I'll be the one dropping off and picking up and L is the one who does that right now but hopefully it'll be ok.
But it's so funny how when you have choices all of a sudden you want to stay where you area. I really don't want to give up this app, and our new daycare is not as tech friendly and does the normal "paper at the end of the day" but that's it.
So we went back and forth but finally decided to go with the new daycare. The teachers are more well established (have been there over 10 years!!) and there's a big educational component to it. The girls at our current place are very nice and care for them adequately but there isn't the educational component. Other pluses: they will make bottles for us (no more having to make 8 bottles the night before to bring!), and when they start drinking cows milk around a year, they get their milk from a local dairy!
Still I am going to miss where they are and the constant updates! This will definitely take a little getting used to!
Oh, and just because this is awesome: :)
The four day work week is helping, as Fridays are my day I get to catch up with the house ( a mis-nomer - I get a little bit done, but never enough!). It's nice to relax a bit though after a whole week of go go go.
Daycare has been pretty good so far. I was so nervous about it because I chose them so quickly (since I had no other choice) and they (the daycare teachers) are all REALLY young over there. But they seem to love the girls and they send me pics of the girls throughout the day quite often, in addition to me seeing every time they change, feed or nap. I'm addicted to that app.
But unfortunately, L's office is moving about 30 minutes away in November, and it will be really out of the way for us, so, in order not to be caught without a daycare like we were initially, we started looking a couple of weeks ago. First I called the daycare I wanted from the beginning because it has such a good reputation, but they once again were so snotty to me. I don't understand. I PAID an application fee over a year ago now and they told me I would able to start around the time I wanted. Not only do they still not have any spots, when I asked them when they thought they might be able to take the girls they were like, "Um...November, maybe December. Maybe not. And even then, there might be only 1 spot available." WTF did I pay $ for? I'm so angry about it.
So I googled around looking for other day cares and found a toddler daycare (starts at 18 months) nearby where L's office will be moving to. And while the girls couldn't start there till next August, I wanted to check it out to get on the list now and make sure I was definitely able to start when I wanted to. Even if we had to stay with the daycare that's out of the way for awhile, at some point we'd be able to switch over.
It was great. We loved it so much, and we talked to the director and were assured (without putting any money down) that they will call US and we are definitely in next year.
I called a few other places close to his work and got info, but didn't find glowing reviews about anyplace else except for this one in the federal building. I called and they said their waiting list was until about March 2014. Ugh. But I decided to fill out an application anyway since it was free (ahem, NO application fee!) and I wrote a note with it saying I had twins and was desperate to find a spot in the next few months since my husband's job was moving.
Long shot, but the very next day after I mailed it they called me and said they had two spots opening in September. Whoa! Now really, September is a little bit earlier than we need, but beggars can't be choosers. L and I went and visited it and liked it very much. I think the commute is going to be a bit rough for me for awhile as I'll be the one dropping off and picking up and L is the one who does that right now but hopefully it'll be ok.
But it's so funny how when you have choices all of a sudden you want to stay where you area. I really don't want to give up this app, and our new daycare is not as tech friendly and does the normal "paper at the end of the day" but that's it.
So we went back and forth but finally decided to go with the new daycare. The teachers are more well established (have been there over 10 years!!) and there's a big educational component to it. The girls at our current place are very nice and care for them adequately but there isn't the educational component. Other pluses: they will make bottles for us (no more having to make 8 bottles the night before to bring!), and when they start drinking cows milk around a year, they get their milk from a local dairy!
Still I am going to miss where they are and the constant updates! This will definitely take a little getting used to!
Oh, and just because this is awesome: :)
Friday, July 12, 2013
Almost Daycare Time!
Last day home alone with the babies!! I think a little picture of today is appropriate to post here! :)
Not the best quality photo (darn iPhone!) but I still love it. M is grabbing onto N who is smiling at me :) I'm going to hold it in my heart next week while they're away.
I don't go back to work myself for another 2.5 weeks but we had a huge mix up with daycare and this was the best we could do. I'm not sure if I ever wrote about it here. Last year while "pregnant" (seriously this was at about 8 weeks) I checked out a few daycares and decided upon one. Filled out and paid the application fee and everything. Of course I was nervous because I needed room for TWO babies, not just one!
Fast forward to early June and I still hadn't heard about them starting daycare in August, which is what I had wanted. I call to double check and they tell me I'm still on a waiting list. What waiting list? There hadn't been any when I originally signed up. Well apparently they had a lot of sibling births inbetween, which I COMPLETELY understand but what I didn't understand is why they didn't let me know? What is the purpose of the application fee if they just get to ignore me forever? So the 1 year I thought I had on everyone else disappeared and I was completely without a daycare when I went back to work. So I called around and just luckily found a daycare that could take the both of them but they had to start mid-July instead of August. I was just so lucky to get a place where they both could go (instead of having to drive to two different ones) so quickly. We went and checked them out and they were fine so we put down our deposit. It's really close to L's job which is great but L's job will be moving in late fall so hopefully our first place will open up by then. Also the first place is a little cheaper than the new place, and I did like it better (they teach the babies sign language!) but this place will be fine for awhile.
In a way I am grateful I have a few weeks before I have to go back to work because A) I REALLY need to clean my house which has been severely neglected over the last 5+ months and B) I won't feel as guilty because I'll be at home and close by instead of at work and harder to leave if necessary. Of course I'm not grateful for having to pay for another few weeks :)
Not the best quality photo (darn iPhone!) but I still love it. M is grabbing onto N who is smiling at me :) I'm going to hold it in my heart next week while they're away.
I don't go back to work myself for another 2.5 weeks but we had a huge mix up with daycare and this was the best we could do. I'm not sure if I ever wrote about it here. Last year while "pregnant" (seriously this was at about 8 weeks) I checked out a few daycares and decided upon one. Filled out and paid the application fee and everything. Of course I was nervous because I needed room for TWO babies, not just one!
Fast forward to early June and I still hadn't heard about them starting daycare in August, which is what I had wanted. I call to double check and they tell me I'm still on a waiting list. What waiting list? There hadn't been any when I originally signed up. Well apparently they had a lot of sibling births inbetween, which I COMPLETELY understand but what I didn't understand is why they didn't let me know? What is the purpose of the application fee if they just get to ignore me forever? So the 1 year I thought I had on everyone else disappeared and I was completely without a daycare when I went back to work. So I called around and just luckily found a daycare that could take the both of them but they had to start mid-July instead of August. I was just so lucky to get a place where they both could go (instead of having to drive to two different ones) so quickly. We went and checked them out and they were fine so we put down our deposit. It's really close to L's job which is great but L's job will be moving in late fall so hopefully our first place will open up by then. Also the first place is a little cheaper than the new place, and I did like it better (they teach the babies sign language!) but this place will be fine for awhile.
In a way I am grateful I have a few weeks before I have to go back to work because A) I REALLY need to clean my house which has been severely neglected over the last 5+ months and B) I won't feel as guilty because I'll be at home and close by instead of at work and harder to leave if necessary. Of course I'm not grateful for having to pay for another few weeks :)
Friday, June 28, 2013
5 Months Old and the finished nursery!
5 months old today! My little monkeys are currently on the playmat while I type. M is 90% of the way turning over from back to front while in her cloth diaper (she can do it in disposables but cloth is so much bulkier) and N has her first tooth already! Growing up so fast! I'll be putting up pics on my other site soon.
A year and 3 days ago I found out Gabby was pregnant. I can't believe it was all a year ago - doesn't feel that long! We were on vacation with friends in Maine the whole week before and I had told her to test if she wanted. She had tested but didn't tell me! I was so nervous the whole week and really wish she would have because I was working myself into a tizzy that it hadn't worked since she hadn't given me any news. I figured it was because she was getting BFNs and didn't want to ruin my vacation - but I almost ruined it for myself thinking this! When I was back in the office on Monday the 25th I begged her to let me know if she'd tested and what the answer was as a way to prepare myself for the beta on the 26th. I didn't want the news to come from an overworked and cranky nurse. And then she said she'd been getting positives for awhile!! Whee!
Tomorrow is their baptism and I just hope everything goes well. We ordered catered food from a local restaurant and so far haven't been able to pay for it (wouldn't you think they'd be all over that?). Every time I try to call and pay it's almost like I'm bothering them! I'm trying to come up with a back up plan but I'm just really annoyed about it. Also, the priest doing our baptism seems to be all over the place and forget about us one day to the next. When we met with him during baptism class, he forgot about a funeral!! So yea, I'm worried about him remembering about us too.
I finally took pictures of the finished nursery! Only took me 5 months to remember to take them! I'm going to submit them to Apartment Therapy even though I don't take great pictures. I love this room!
A year and 3 days ago I found out Gabby was pregnant. I can't believe it was all a year ago - doesn't feel that long! We were on vacation with friends in Maine the whole week before and I had told her to test if she wanted. She had tested but didn't tell me! I was so nervous the whole week and really wish she would have because I was working myself into a tizzy that it hadn't worked since she hadn't given me any news. I figured it was because she was getting BFNs and didn't want to ruin my vacation - but I almost ruined it for myself thinking this! When I was back in the office on Monday the 25th I begged her to let me know if she'd tested and what the answer was as a way to prepare myself for the beta on the 26th. I didn't want the news to come from an overworked and cranky nurse. And then she said she'd been getting positives for awhile!! Whee!
Tomorrow is their baptism and I just hope everything goes well. We ordered catered food from a local restaurant and so far haven't been able to pay for it (wouldn't you think they'd be all over that?). Every time I try to call and pay it's almost like I'm bothering them! I'm trying to come up with a back up plan but I'm just really annoyed about it. Also, the priest doing our baptism seems to be all over the place and forget about us one day to the next. When we met with him during baptism class, he forgot about a funeral!! So yea, I'm worried about him remembering about us too.
I finally took pictures of the finished nursery! Only took me 5 months to remember to take them! I'm going to submit them to Apartment Therapy even though I don't take great pictures. I love this room!
Sunday, June 9, 2013
A Year of Firsts
A year of first is upon us...starting with tomorrow. June 10, 2012 I had my egg retrieval that resulted in my two beautiful little girls napping in their cribs right now.
One year ago today, I wrote this post, lamenting the fact that once again, my IVF cycle was not going as planned. My E2 went up to 1839 and then dropped precipitously, to 1474.
We ended up with 8 eggs retrieved, 6 mature, and only 3 fertilized. No one has ever been able to tell me why my E2 drops like that when my eggs are pretty clearly "good."
We went downstate yesterday to take our Catholic baptism class. I actually enjoyed it very much! It was given by one of the deacons and was very practical, I appreciated it. Afterwards my parents invited my inlaws and my brother and SIL and her parents came over for lunch. Long day, and the girls didn't nap a lot. But they are so well-behaved. I'm so proud and I'm pretty sure we don't have anything to do with it. I watched my brother trying to get his 10 week old son to sleep for well over an hour and am so grateful my two girls are such great sleepers - seriously, like 5 minutes to get them to sleep 95% of the time.
This morning, we dropped the girls off at the church daycare and went to the protestant church again, then took a tour of the church for people who want to be new members. This church is so open, I really love it, but I really miss my Catholic church sometimes...if nothing else because it's familiar. Yesterday at the class I saw a pamphlet on "Easy Catholic questions" and learned that Catholics really must go to church really only ONE time per year, the Easter service. That's not really true, since I'm pretty sure not going to mass is a sin (or so I was taught) but I started thinking today, maybe we could join BOTH churches - go to the Protestant church regularly, but go to the Catholic church at least once a year (although I love midnight masses, so maybe twice). Then my kids could get the benefit of both. I don't think I have the guts to tell either one of them (the churches) though. I asked L if he would be ok with that, and he said yes, and that it might be nice because they could benefit from the diversity of knowing both. So that might be the plan. A weird one, but nonetheless something that would make me happy :)
One year ago today, I wrote this post, lamenting the fact that once again, my IVF cycle was not going as planned. My E2 went up to 1839 and then dropped precipitously, to 1474.
We ended up with 8 eggs retrieved, 6 mature, and only 3 fertilized. No one has ever been able to tell me why my E2 drops like that when my eggs are pretty clearly "good."
We went downstate yesterday to take our Catholic baptism class. I actually enjoyed it very much! It was given by one of the deacons and was very practical, I appreciated it. Afterwards my parents invited my inlaws and my brother and SIL and her parents came over for lunch. Long day, and the girls didn't nap a lot. But they are so well-behaved. I'm so proud and I'm pretty sure we don't have anything to do with it. I watched my brother trying to get his 10 week old son to sleep for well over an hour and am so grateful my two girls are such great sleepers - seriously, like 5 minutes to get them to sleep 95% of the time.
This morning, we dropped the girls off at the church daycare and went to the protestant church again, then took a tour of the church for people who want to be new members. This church is so open, I really love it, but I really miss my Catholic church sometimes...if nothing else because it's familiar. Yesterday at the class I saw a pamphlet on "Easy Catholic questions" and learned that Catholics really must go to church really only ONE time per year, the Easter service. That's not really true, since I'm pretty sure not going to mass is a sin (or so I was taught) but I started thinking today, maybe we could join BOTH churches - go to the Protestant church regularly, but go to the Catholic church at least once a year (although I love midnight masses, so maybe twice). Then my kids could get the benefit of both. I don't think I have the guts to tell either one of them (the churches) though. I asked L if he would be ok with that, and he said yes, and that it might be nice because they could benefit from the diversity of knowing both. So that might be the plan. A weird one, but nonetheless something that would make me happy :)
Monday, June 3, 2013
Hidy Ho
I am amazed at how much my blogging time has been curtailed lately. The first 4-6 weeks I was like, "I can do this, no problem!" and now I think "Oh I want to write about that," and then in never happens.
The girls are 4 months now and doing great. N is a little squealer - she doesn't laugh, but she gives these squealy shrieks of happiness. I love it. M is starting to become quite the babbler. She smiles, not as often as N who just grins, and is definitely the "quieter" of the two, no laughing or squealing from her, but she loves to talk, mostly to herself. And blow bubbles.
N had quite the growth spurt a few weeks ago where my pediatrician's office suggested starting her on solids because she was drinking so much, but I really don't want to go there before 6 months. I had a talk with my actual pediatrician (as opposed to the phone nurses) and have a bit better idea that I'll just "know" when it's time, and I feel more comfortable about it, even if it's before 6 months.
I was in Target yesterday because we were in desperate need of more bibs (N goes through a lot!) and I came across those rubber coated spoons and the thought of starting solids just thrilled me. So I went and took a look at all the options out there. "Baby's First Carrots" and all the jars and pouches there are. So much fun! And I was so filled with happiness I almost wanted to cry (why or why am I always so emotional?). Because there's always going to be something new to look forward to with these girls. Solids, and sitting up (unassisted) and crawling, and walking, saying words, etc. etc. A whole new world, hell a whole new life has opened up. Finally, I have it. It's so exciting.
And L and I were talking about this Thanksgiving and we realized the girls will actually be able to have some sweet potatoes and maybe a tiny bit of mushed/very cut up turkey. There's just so much to look forward to!
We are baptizing them at the end of this month in the Catholic church, back in my hometown. But we are looking for a church up here where we live and I'm not sure we will stay with Catholic. We checked out a Protestant church here Sunday that we liked very much. They have free daycare during church! I guess churches are starting to do this now because it certainly wasn't available when I was little! So we dropped them off there and then had a peaceful hour in church together, just the two of us. After the hour was over we went back to get them and the childcare people didn't want to give them up :)
AF is late again this month (after a couple of very on time months). I actually thought I might be pregnant - good timing for DTD (even though we didn't do that with the intention of TTC), sore boobs, even got sick the other day after dinner which was very random, so I took a test this morning and total BFN. It wouldn't be the ideal time anyway AND I'd probably miscarry again anyway, but I admit I was still hopeful. Sheesh. I really need to get on and take my Metformin regularly and I've been really bad about it. I'll take it on time for a few days but then forget and only take it 1x a day or go a few days without it altogether. Because my eating schedule is all over the place and because I'm supposed to take it with meals, it's really not regular.
2 more months of maternity leave and then back to work. I can't believe I've been out over 4 months already! I wish I could work part time - I'm ready to get out a bit more but the thought of trying to juggle everything and a FT job scares me!
The girls are 4 months now and doing great. N is a little squealer - she doesn't laugh, but she gives these squealy shrieks of happiness. I love it. M is starting to become quite the babbler. She smiles, not as often as N who just grins, and is definitely the "quieter" of the two, no laughing or squealing from her, but she loves to talk, mostly to herself. And blow bubbles.
N had quite the growth spurt a few weeks ago where my pediatrician's office suggested starting her on solids because she was drinking so much, but I really don't want to go there before 6 months. I had a talk with my actual pediatrician (as opposed to the phone nurses) and have a bit better idea that I'll just "know" when it's time, and I feel more comfortable about it, even if it's before 6 months.
I was in Target yesterday because we were in desperate need of more bibs (N goes through a lot!) and I came across those rubber coated spoons and the thought of starting solids just thrilled me. So I went and took a look at all the options out there. "Baby's First Carrots" and all the jars and pouches there are. So much fun! And I was so filled with happiness I almost wanted to cry (why or why am I always so emotional?). Because there's always going to be something new to look forward to with these girls. Solids, and sitting up (unassisted) and crawling, and walking, saying words, etc. etc. A whole new world, hell a whole new life has opened up. Finally, I have it. It's so exciting.
And L and I were talking about this Thanksgiving and we realized the girls will actually be able to have some sweet potatoes and maybe a tiny bit of mushed/very cut up turkey. There's just so much to look forward to!
We are baptizing them at the end of this month in the Catholic church, back in my hometown. But we are looking for a church up here where we live and I'm not sure we will stay with Catholic. We checked out a Protestant church here Sunday that we liked very much. They have free daycare during church! I guess churches are starting to do this now because it certainly wasn't available when I was little! So we dropped them off there and then had a peaceful hour in church together, just the two of us. After the hour was over we went back to get them and the childcare people didn't want to give them up :)
AF is late again this month (after a couple of very on time months). I actually thought I might be pregnant - good timing for DTD (even though we didn't do that with the intention of TTC), sore boobs, even got sick the other day after dinner which was very random, so I took a test this morning and total BFN. It wouldn't be the ideal time anyway AND I'd probably miscarry again anyway, but I admit I was still hopeful. Sheesh. I really need to get on and take my Metformin regularly and I've been really bad about it. I'll take it on time for a few days but then forget and only take it 1x a day or go a few days without it altogether. Because my eating schedule is all over the place and because I'm supposed to take it with meals, it's really not regular.
2 more months of maternity leave and then back to work. I can't believe I've been out over 4 months already! I wish I could work part time - I'm ready to get out a bit more but the thought of trying to juggle everything and a FT job scares me!
Sunday, May 12, 2013
On This Mother's Day
One of the best things I've ever read on infertility and Mother's Day. From http://inconceivablebook.com/blog/ivf/dear-infertile-friend-my-mothers-day-gift-for-you/
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Dear Infertile Friend,
I wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you this Mother’s Day. Of course, I think of you every day, but on this day, which I know is particularly difficult for you, I want you to know that you’re in my heart. I imagine, at times, it may seem that I’m oblivious to your struggles. As if somehow I’ve forgotten what it was like to stand in your shoes. I assure you, I haven’t. In fact, I’ll never, ever forget what it was like to walk the very lonely and scary path of infertility. I acutely remember when Mother’s Day was a reminder of everything I wasn’t, instead of a celebration of everything I ever wanted to be.
In honor of Mother’s Day I want to give you a gift. A gift I hope you’ll treasure. It’s not a magic bullet. I don’t have one of those. Instead, it’s a promise—actually a few promises. Promises that I hope will sustain you through your journey.
I promise not to give you unsolicited advice about conceiving. I know you are relaxing. That stress isn’t the problem and a vacation isn’t the answer. I’m also very aware that how it finally worked for me (or my cousin or my neighbor or my grandma’s friend’s great-niece) probably isn’t the cure for you. I’ll never assume I have the answer to your prayers…I promise.
I promise not to complain about my kids in front of you. We all know that raising children is challenging. I’m also aware you’d give your left arm to be knee deep in messy diapers and snotty noses. There’ll be no child-related venting to you…I promise.
I promise to include you in our family related activities and understand when you decline. I know you love my family. I also understand being around little ones can be hard for you right now. I’ll be sad that you’re not there, so I’ll continue to pray fervently for your miracle…I promise.
Most importantly, I promise to be here when you need me. I’ll listen empathetically and squeeze your hand for encouragement. Lean on me when you need to—my shoulders will hold you up and my love for you will catch your tears. I’ll walk through this with you, admiring your bravery every step of the way…I promise.
Please accept this Mother’s Day gift. It’s a reminder that even though at times I may say or do the wrong thing, I know, in the depth of my soul, that you would make a terrific mother. I can’t wait for the day when we can celebrate this occasion differently. Until then, please remember you are not alone, my friend. Whatever—whenever—just say the word. I WILL be your biggest cheerleader…I promise.
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Dear Infertile Friend,
I wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you this Mother’s Day. Of course, I think of you every day, but on this day, which I know is particularly difficult for you, I want you to know that you’re in my heart. I imagine, at times, it may seem that I’m oblivious to your struggles. As if somehow I’ve forgotten what it was like to stand in your shoes. I assure you, I haven’t. In fact, I’ll never, ever forget what it was like to walk the very lonely and scary path of infertility. I acutely remember when Mother’s Day was a reminder of everything I wasn’t, instead of a celebration of everything I ever wanted to be.
In honor of Mother’s Day I want to give you a gift. A gift I hope you’ll treasure. It’s not a magic bullet. I don’t have one of those. Instead, it’s a promise—actually a few promises. Promises that I hope will sustain you through your journey.
I promise not to give you unsolicited advice about conceiving. I know you are relaxing. That stress isn’t the problem and a vacation isn’t the answer. I’m also very aware that how it finally worked for me (or my cousin or my neighbor or my grandma’s friend’s great-niece) probably isn’t the cure for you. I’ll never assume I have the answer to your prayers…I promise.
I promise not to complain about my kids in front of you. We all know that raising children is challenging. I’m also aware you’d give your left arm to be knee deep in messy diapers and snotty noses. There’ll be no child-related venting to you…I promise.
I promise to include you in our family related activities and understand when you decline. I know you love my family. I also understand being around little ones can be hard for you right now. I’ll be sad that you’re not there, so I’ll continue to pray fervently for your miracle…I promise.
Most importantly, I promise to be here when you need me. I’ll listen empathetically and squeeze your hand for encouragement. Lean on me when you need to—my shoulders will hold you up and my love for you will catch your tears. I’ll walk through this with you, admiring your bravery every step of the way…I promise.
Please accept this Mother’s Day gift. It’s a reminder that even though at times I may say or do the wrong thing, I know, in the depth of my soul, that you would make a terrific mother. I can’t wait for the day when we can celebrate this occasion differently. Until then, please remember you are not alone, my friend. Whatever—whenever—just say the word. I WILL be your biggest cheerleader…I promise.
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