Monday, January 30, 2012

The Potential Surrogate Meeting

Oy, what a weekend! We drove 2.5 hours south (one way, so 5 hours total) to my aunt's house for a big family dinner on Saturday night, and didn't get home till midnight. then we left at 10am on Sunday to make the 3 hour east(1 way) to meet with our potential surrogate and her family. So exhausted, I'm almost glad to be back at work!

The meeting went really well. I'm really excited, and I just realize how embittered I am over this whole infertility journey. I'm going to have to come up with a nickname for this blog because it looks like we'll be working together!! *throws confetti*

Well, presuming all the legal stuff comes together. I don't see why it shouldn't though.

They live in a cute colonial with a fantastic backyard in MA and she and her husband have three kids and are DONE so far as that's concerned. They are ADORABLE. L and I brought them coloring books and crayons, and we were hanging around Target on saturday night (before we drove all the way home from my aunt's) trying to find something to get for them and realized how out of our league we were. No one in my family has any kids yet and my two closest friends just had their first babies last November and 3 weeks ago. And I'm in my 30s. go figure. So I have not had any need to buy kid stuff ever, and even all the baby gifts I just bought aren't kid toys yet.

So I wanted to buy one (well three) of those water coloring books - do you remember them? The ones that had color "invisibly" in the coloring book pages and when you took your paint brush and dipped it in water and painted in the lines it turned colors? I thought it would be fun and not too messy but they don't exist anymore!! Now they have clear markers that you color over the lines and then the pictures turn colors instead. What, was water too messy? The markers seem so wasteful to me.

We were there for about 3 hours just chatting about our families and ourselves with a little surrogate stuff in there. I mean, I was pretty much decided even before the phone call. This was just to meet them and make sure they weren't psychos - and all major questions were answered in our phone call already. We talked alot about baby stuff (like we were assuming this would just WORK the first time) and it's when I realized how bitter I was as a person. The surrogate (ok, I NEED a nickname...hmm...) was talking about her first baby and how after she saw the heartbeat she was so relieved because it's only a 5% chance of miscarriage after that and I couldn't help but cynically say, "yep, but that chance always seemed to find me." and they asked if we watched Parenthood and I told them we don't because we try to stay away from all parenty/baby type shows because it's just too difficult for us. As I was saying it I realized how bitter I sounded but I think the pain is still too close for me. I honestly don't think I will get over it until I have a child in my arms. The tears always sneak up when I'm not expecting it.

But she was great and a total chatterbox. Seriously after we left it was so quiet in the car and it was kind of nice, lol. I never thought I was that quiet of a person, but I was sort of yesterday.

She emailed me last night saying how great it was to meet us in person and how we all get along so well. She said she was putting her daughter to bed last night and often she will trace the names of their family on her back as she rubs her back to get her to go to sleep. Apparently their daughter asked her yesterday to trace L and my names on her back. So cute :)

So she's emailed the surrogate agency to say she's excited to work with us and I will tonight and then we'll see what the next steps are! Send in more money to the agency, I'm sure.

Ok, after some thinking about it, the new nickname for our surrogate will be Gabby. Get it? :)


  1. I'm glad it went so well. She and her family sound so cute.

  2. So glad things are going well and you two hit it off so well!

  3. wait Gabby I'm confussed? Good luck! I'm glad it went so well.

    1. Gabby because she talks so much..heh, bad joke.

  4. I can't believe you had to pay $10,000 just to get this far. That's insane! But, glad the meeting went well.

  5. So glad to hear the meet up went well! Sounds like you are on your way. xx