Sunday, December 9, 2012

Hating Exercise

10 weeks left! Oh my goodness, we are almost to single digits!!!

The room is ....continuing to be worked on. This flooring business is taking FOREVER. L works on that while I am sewing. Have I mentioned I am a very basic sewer? I am trying to make tab top curtains for the nursery and it's going ok. It won't look like a professional did it but hopefully it will be good enough.

We have learned we will be hosting Christmas for 10 people. In our tiny condo. We have 1 table that holds 4 people -oy. Should be fun!

In other news, I've been on a tear this week regarding medical stuff. All self-induced. It started when L and I went over my SIL and BIL's house after Thanksgiving to see their babies.

My SIL has always been slightly overweight. But right before she got pregnant she had found out that she was insulin resistant, gone on some meds (metformin) and dropped a lot, almost instantly it seemed. Now that she's given birth, she continues to look great.

I am jealous. The years of infertility treatments, and general depression have done a number on me. I have gained about 60lbs since my wedding. And my metabolism sucks. I swear I do not eat as badly as I look heavy. All my friends agree, I eat so much less than them but I can never lose any weight. I lost a total of 5 lbs from my last IVF cycle in June and nothing since. I had high hopes of losing weight by the time my babies are born but I never could get started on that. For the first few months I was just too anxious and depressed about whether they would make it and since then I've just been too anxious and stressed about everything else. I swear I should take a med for anxiety.

But after seeing her the other week (SIL) I decided it was time to check back in with the RE and make sure I didn't have PCOS (something I have always suspected I may have due to my long cycles) and what if the reason why I couldn't lose weight was because of insulin resistance too?

Really, I've started wondering if something is up with my hormones generally - because I also get horrible cystic acne. It's terrible, I am 34 years old and break out with bad acne all the time. It is not right at this age.

So off to the RE I went. And I found out that I had never been checked for PCOS in all my time there. I was really surprised. So I went through the whole workup and got the results last week.

And....nothing.

No PCOS. My testosterone is perfect...other tests are perfect.

No insulin resistance. (Yea, I feel like a dork for having that checked).

In essence, nothing to explain my crazy long cycles. Luckily, my AMH is still good, and other things all checked out well.

So I was being silly.

(Or I was just hoping on a lark that maybe something easy had been missed a long time ago that would explain the last 4 years to me). But no.

Really what I need to do, in the midst of everything else, is get onto a good exercise schedule for a lazy, overweight person and lose some pounds. But like everything else it's just one more thing to do. And I hate exercise. People say find something you like to do to exercise and I don't have anything. And I hate being outside in the cold in the winter. And there's no gyms near me (within 20 minutes) to exercise at.

And yes, I could come up with 101 excuses.

But I can't come up with 101 motivations. Even my potential children isn't enough to help with that. How terrible.

10 weeks to go...why can't I get something together for 10 weeks?

Any suggestions for a lazy girl like me?



12 comments:

  1. I hate exercise too. I do it (or used to do it) a lot, but I hated every minute of it. I did like yoga. I did the harder yoga (not "hot" yoga -- just a kind that's far more active than the normal gentle stuff), and I really liked that. I didn't get nearly as bored. Otherwise I would just put on teenager pop music and read gossip magazines while I worked out. I honestly think I was doing it only for the magazines most of the time.

    Did you ever have your thyroid checked, or checked recently? That's the only other thing I can think of that can shift over time.

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  2. I am the same in that I eat less than people and still hold 20 extra lbs. The PCOS doesn't help but I do run! Do you not like sweating or would you like yoga tapes?

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  3. I need to lose 20 lbs and i just can't bring myself to do it. I suck! Your not alone!

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  4. I hate exercise, and I love eating. I could do with losing about 10 more lbs. But I managed to lose 10 earlier this year using my fitness pal. It makes you track your calories and watch what you eat, if you exercise then you get to eat more because it is based on net calories. That way if you don't exercise, you can still lose weight. And it allows for nearly everything to count as exercise, including taking the dog for a walk and cleaning the house.

    If you can stick to it religiously for 10 weeks, I swear you will lose at minimum 10 lbs, if not more.

    The only exercise I can stand is yoga, the app gives too few calories burned for yoga so I looked it up on the internet and enter it manually. There are many free online yoga videos too so you don't even have to leave your house.

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  5. I wish I had some suggestions for you but I need major help in the motivation dept. I used to exercise all the time and did a lot of different things. I used to do a lot of the jillian michaels videos. Since losing my daughter I just have little interest in things. I have been trying to run a few days a week but that's it. Part of me wonders if its related to my zoloft though. At any rate, hopefully u find something that works for you.

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  6. Wow! Getting so close!

    I don't think you're a dork for asking to be checked at all. Definitely a valid concern, but sorry you still don't have any answers.

    It's a real struggle. I found my treadmill invaluable for me, because I do not like going outdoors a lot and did not like traveling to a gym (we did have a membership for a year, but it was such a hassle going across town that it wasn't worth it.) The best thing about my treadmill is I can workout whenever I want, no matter the weather, just whenever I have time. I don't usually get my workout done until 10pm (we're night owls anyway) but I still get it in. Walking on it and reading my kindle help me pass the time on my walking days, and on my jogging days listening to music helps.

    Yoga is really nice too since it's low impact and relaxing.

    Once the babies get here and the weather gets better, you'll be able to take them for walks too :) I wasn't much for getting out, but once we had V we were taking him on walks and going to the zoo a lot (visiting everything at our zoo covers 5 miles walking... definitely a workout!)

    My biggest motivator though is keeping myself held accountable. I have my blog, I write about it on FB, I use Sparkpeople to plan my weight loss and enter my daily food/exercise to keep track of everything. Sometimes it feels like a hassle, but it helps me so much. I weigh in monthly and take progression photos- being able to visibly see the progress helps a lot too!

    I know it's really hard to find the motivation sometimes though. I've lost about 71 lbs but it hasn't been easy at all. I've really struggled, I've had to give up certain foods/drinks, I have to stay active every day. Now I do have PCOS and take Metformin, but it never made my weight melt off. I'm jealous of your SIL too, yikes. It helped me lose maybe 5lbs initially? But after that I've had to really work it. I walk 1-2 miles 4x a week, 3x a week I jog 2-2.5miles, then walk another half mile, then do a post run yoga stretch, crunches and push-ups (those days are killer.) I started out just jogging at 2.5mph 3x a week though, and I had to work myself up slowly because of how out of shape I was. You have to start somewhere, even just walking a little bit a couple of times a week is better than nothing :)

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  7. Since you don't have a gym close by, you could try Jillian Michaels' workout. It kicks your butt, but it's only 20 minutes so it's not like you're forcing yourself to exercise for an entire hour. It goes by pretty fast. I also found this Yoga Booty Ballet video years ago that I really like. It's sort of fun, and pretty easy, but yet you still feel like you did something - and back when I was doing it regularly I could see a difference in my booty ;) But yeah, as far as getting the motivation to actually get up and do this stuff....I've got nothin' for ya because I've been the same way for a long time.

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  8. I like yoga and walking. After trying them out I found that I also love running, weightlifting, and kickboxing. Who knew? Start with what seems least horrible and it may get you into the mood for more. If you don't hate walking, I'd start with that. You can just bundle up and go. All the motivation it takes is getting dressed and out the door. Don't focus on the exercise part of it. Just promise yourself you'll put on your 'walking clothes' every morning.

    As for your diet, do you have a weakness? Like soda, mochas, bacon, cereal...?
    Sometimes cutting one thing out will get you 10 pounds just on its own. And make sure to eat breakfast! Like oatmeal.

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  9. I can't believe just 10 weeks left, you're getting so close!! as hmmk said - I LOVE yoga, and walking is always good... I also really try to eat smaller meals throughout the day, of healthy stuff - fruit, nuts, etc - it helps keep your metabolism going so it burns through the little meals you eat quicker/better than less larger meals...

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  10. I hate exercise too. I do it, but I hate it. If it's any help, I have normal (fairly low on the normal range, actually) testosterone levels and no insulin resistance, but my RE has still diagnosed me with PCOS. Every RE is different and uses different criteria, but she excluded thyroid problems and premature ovarian failure and, by default, diagnosed me with PCOS because there's no other explanation for my irregular cycles. Which could explain my cystic acne and my trouble losing weight as well. Maybe yours too??? The hormonal imbalances causing PCOS could cause the weight problems too. Just a thought. But I hope you can find something that motivates you so you feel better about yourself. Those girls need a happy mama who knows how rocking gorgeous she is!

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  11. I was going to suggestion Jillian too. You can do anything for 20mins

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  12. 10 weeks! How exciting!!
    I too hate exercise. I keep thinking that I need to start with a view that we may start the IVF soon and no doubt that will pile on the pounds on top of Christmas, but I just can't be bothered!
    Could you start with something at home like a Wii fit? or exercise DVD?
    If I had a bigger living room I would try a dance one, but that is just another excuse! ;)

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