Babies

We are being profiled again. Didn't get much in the way of details and I'm not holding out much hope - just happy to be out there for something!

I called on Friday to check in on things and once again she said, "This is so funny! You always call when I'm about to call you!"

I have no intuition about these things and at this point, I'm ready to call BS. I don't really like calling for no reason, but if this is the only way we're going to get profiled I will do it. Sigh...

The expectant birth mom had just come in with her mom (she's in HS) which our advocate said was a good sign because she has family support. She's due this THURSDAY which makes me think she will probably end up changing her mind. I say that because coming in with your mom the week before strikes me as someone who's not really interested in making a birth plan and may only be doing so because your mom is making you. I could be wrong - maybe it's just a teenagery thing to do. It's nice we won't have to wait all that long to find out what the outcome is though. I didn't get that many details, like I did about the other opportunity we had, except that there's no info on the birth dad, and no drug/alcohol issues to be concerned with. I have no idea if the birthmom wants a relationship or not. As you can tell, I'm trying not to get too invested in this.

It's hard though, even with very little info. Just the thought of possibly having a baby next weekend or the week after makes me think about it too much. I spent the weekend with babies. On Saturday my BFF and I went downstate to visit with some high school friends (including one who now lives in KS and she brought her two kids - 5 & 6. My BFF's baby is almost 5 months old and the day ended with me changing her in a thruway rest stop changing room and helping feed her out by the food stations. BFF and I kept getting knowing looks as we passed the baby back and forth from passersby, like we were a couple! Hahahaha. BFF said loudly to the baby, "A___ has two mommies!" It was pretty funny.

Then Sunday morning we were invited to the christening of my coworker's baby who will be three months old soon. I keep calling her my coworker but she is one of my best friends too - but the one I call my BFF I've known since 9 years old and coworker I've known for 4 years - we are very close though. Her mother in law is a pastor and did the christening - which unlike Catholic baptisms which I am used to was done in front of the whole congregation. She only invited me and L and two other close friends (husband and wife) out of everyone she knows so it made me feel good that we were so special to her. Once again her MIL thanked us profusely after the service for coming and coworker's husband kept thanking us again and again both at the service and when we went to their house afterwards for pizza. It got to be a little strange - there's only so many times you can say "you're welcome" without it sounding weird. But he kept saying it and L finally came up to me and asked why he was saying it so much, to which I didn't know. But finally I caught up to him alone in the kitchen and he said almost exactly what his mother did when I went to coworker's baby shower in December - that he knew it was tough for us and he was just so grateful we would come to the baptism. It wasn't as eloquently put as his MIL had said it back then, and I felt a little more awkward but it was nice.

Since the christening was held in the middle of the mass they did the rest of the mass too and there was a lot of silence and prayers and stuff and his mom/pastor talked a lot about going through tough times etc. and I couldn't help it but the tears flowed through a lot of that part of the service. I don't know if he saw it or his mom did (he was in the pew in front of us and obviously his mom was at the front but it wasn't that big of a church) so maybe that's why he felt like he had to thank us. Of course he didn't - but in another way it's so nice when people recognize that something may be difficult for you.

I'm not that religious but of course all I could think about is where we'll get our baby(ies) christened when the time comes. It was just one more reminder that we still have no one at home.

I have more to write but it'll have to wait for tomorrow.