Made it to transfer!

Wahoo! I feel like such a weight is lifted off me. No, I don't know if this cycle will work out at all, but at least we made it to transfer, so we have a chance. I have been so down in the dumps and now I can breathe a sigh of relief.

I waited all morning yesterday for the call that would tell me about the embies. But no call came. At first I was like, "no call, that must be a good sign, because they would have called me early if they all had arrested, right?" But by 1pm I was so antsy that it meant something else I couldn't take it anymore. Gabby wasn't scheduled for transfer until 4:45pm (!!) so I thought by 1:30pm they had to know something.

I emailed nurse Susan, who told me she had no idea and it was something another floor took care of. But she gave me the number and I called them. They told me they hadn't even looked yet today - which totally freaked me out - that meant they could all be arrested and nobody would have known and I would have waited all this time! They said they wouldn't look until an hour before transfer, which I thought was sort of crappy. Gabby could be on her way by then! But I just said thanks and hung up the phone, about to have a panic attack.

Seriously, all day, whenever my phone would ring, I started hyperventilating, afraid of what the news would be. But five minutes after I hung up with them, I got a call from the embryologist who said they had looked at them because they could hear I was so worried. I thanked her profusely for not making me wait another 2 hours. Her next sentence was, "we have good news" which she said first, again to relax me. THANK GOD! I stopped shaking at that point.

So, all 3 made it to day 3! I had a 7-cell, an 8-cell, and a 9-cell, and they all were cleaving nicely and looked pretty good (her words). Such a relief! Then she went on to tell me they would be transferring two into Gabby.

Hold on, I thought the plan was 3. I mean, I was ok with whatever Dr. A wanted, I just wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page. If she had changed her mind and thought 2 was fine, I would have been fine with that too. But I asked the embryologist to page Dr. A and make sure. She said to me, well you know, based on your age, and the fact that you  have a carrier, 2 is what we do. And that's FINE. But just confirm it with Dr. A!

Never one to sit back, I emailed Dr. A right away (what, me wait for someone I don't know to contact my doctor? Pssh!) Soon enough, I heard back from her saying that no, she wanted three and she was going to make sure they understood three. Ok, whatever she says, I thought.

About 1/2 hour later I heard back from the other doctor, who didn't sound too happy with me. "I spoke with Dr. A," she said, "But I guess you contacted her as well?"

"Yes," I said sheepishly. "I emailed her because I wanted to understand what was going on." Lady, I don't know who you are - maybe you're a slacker who wouldn't have called her in time? I am pro-active about myself! So they indeed transferred all three into Gabby, who texted me before and after the procedure, and of course made me laugh the whole time.

Among a few great ones:

"Just signed the consent, getting ready, I really have to pee!"

"They're in!!!!!!!!!!"

"Just walked out, walking really slow just in case."

"The process was comfortable and weirdly relaxing and nice, love those warm blankets."

"They put my legs in pillowcases and then in the stirrups. It was like a hug for my legs!"

I mean, really, "hug for my legs" ?? I love this girl.

I has asked the embryologist what the reasoning was for 3 vs. 2 and she told me it was based on my history. Dr. A thinks that even if all three implant (not likely) all 3 won't make it anyway due to my M/C history :( So I guess she thinks a higher number equals a better chance.

In fact, she emailed me after she confirmed the 3 vs. 2 she wrote:

"All set, plan is for three. I am praying starting now!"

I know that is really nice of her, and of course I'm thankful for her prayers (and I told her so). but at the same time, I don't want my doctor saying she's praying for me, because it makes me think she is so unconfident that this will work :(

Gabby called me a few hours later (I swear we don't normally text/talk that much, just yesterday because it was such an important day) and told me they had told her that the 8-cell embryo was perfect, no fragmentation, whereas the 7 and 9 cell ones had some fragmentation around the edges. So the embryologist wasn't confident about the other two but felt good about the one (of course we know that perfect embryos can fail to thrive and imperfect ones can make perfect babies!). All I can do is hope and pray now!

Beta is 6/26. I'm pretty sure we'll know before then but I haven't asked Gabby to POAS and I don't know if she will on her own. We are on vacation next week which is perfect because I will have other things to think about!