Trigger

I had to wait till 4pm for the phone call today. I really feel like my RE is not at all sure about my cycle.

I know I should trust him. After all, he has so much more experience than I do! But I feel so burned by doctors lately (with the exception of Dr. Mike of course) that I'm so wary. It's bad.

L and I got up early to make out clinic appt. and pre-op appt. on time, but fate conspired against us and we got stuck in traffic due to an accident that made us 15 minutes late. Please, I often wait 15 min. for my appt., but us being 15 min. late - it was like we committed a cardinal sin. We got rushed into the pre-op appt., which was scheduled for after our clinic appt. originally, and that I understand, we were right on time for that, but then we were told to go wait in the waiting room for our clinic time. After awhile, I wondered just when we'd be going in. I sent L to ask, and found out they had "rescheduled" our clinic appt. for an hour later! Um, thanks for telling us?

There was no way I was about to sit there for an hour. I'm already really stressed with leaving work for all these appts., so I changed the clinic appt. to the latest I could and went to work for an hour, then came back for my clinic appt., without L. The first he's missed. :(

Well, lining hasn't grown much - 9.5mm, but it's still tri, so that's fine. But again, it seems as if my follies are all over the place. I really only have 5 that at this moment are ready to go, 2 on one side, 3 on the other, and they're 22mm, 21mm, 20mm, 19mm, 18mm. Then I have another 5-10 that are 13-16. The 16s MIGHT make it, but I doubt it. That's really not much.

My E2 was 1306. That's right, it went slightly DOWN from Monday, from 1364 to 1306. IVF Jen said that's my body's way of saying it wants to ovulate soon - I have no idea if that's true of not. Again, it's this trust thing - I should just believe her, right? What's my problem?

But I'm so disappointed. The E2 never got really high - I was hoping for over 2000, without really knowing why. I just hear that the estimate is around 200 of E2 per follie, so it seems like I will only get 6-7 eggs in the end.

I feel like a dud.

I don't get it. All my b/w baseline levels are fine, my ovarian reserve is fine, and all that other stuff, so what's the deal with why so few eggs?

So, at 4pm they called me to trigger tonight, which we did, precisely at 7:30pm. We have to be at the RE Friday morning at 6:45am (yay! not.) and I imagine I'll be done by 9am for a glorious day of zoning out at home.

Well, at least I'm done with stims. I'm just going to hope that those few eggs they collect are of awesome quality and fertilize and, as a girl in this IVF board I frequent wrote in hopes of her own:

...they are going to look so damn good that the embryologist is going to have wet dreams about them. Yep, wet dreams.